On March 3rd of 2024, My Immortal by Tara Gilesbie turned 18. It continues to amuse and mystify users across social media platforms. Eighteen years have passed since its publication and we aren’t any closer to knowing what kind of person just wakes up one day and writes something like this. Come to think of it, who is Tara Gilesbie anyway? Was that even her real name, or an alias? Was this a genuine attempt at writing literature, or is this the product of an elaborate prank?
This story has a funny way of creeping onto my radar every now and then. It’s given birth to so many inside jokes between my friends and I that it has a permanent place in my subconscious.
Here’s a few bangers from the story, just so you can get a feel for what I’m talking about:
That’s just a small dose of what to expect if you’re going into the story blind. I had to pull a few choice lines because I needed to show how uniquely y2K the prose is. Or, as it is best known by- “L33t speak”. It used to be the language of nerds showing off how they can shorthand common words in a way that wouldn’t be recognizable by non-Internet users at a glance. However, once millennials got their hands on it, the format quickly became associated with so-called “noobs” (known as “newbies” these days).
The fanfiction itself is chock full of in depth clothing descriptions, casual self harming that is seen as a fashion statement to the author, poorly written spicy scenes and characters with serious issues that are borderline romanticized. The homophobia is a brand associated with Fujoshis of the 2000s.
The humor of the story lands quite well, even if there’s a ton of lines which didn’t age well. At times, it feels like a not-so thinly veiled advertisement for Hot Topic.
Why does it endure to this day?
Much of the charm surrounding this story is the fact that it is an enigma. Over the years, so many people have come forward claiming authorship. It’s gotten to the point of becoming the modern equivalent of “I’m the real Anastasia Romanov”. We are no closer to getting to know the real Tara today than we were in 2007. To be honest, I hope it stays that way.
I don’t want to know if this was genuine or satire. I get the need for closure, but let’s be real for a second; if there was a definitive answer, this story would likely fade into obscurity like the majority of Fanfiction tends to.
Assuming that the original author hasn’t come forward, why would they want to at this point? Internet clout is alluring, but I very much doubt the author really wants their entire legacy to being that they wrote an infamous fanfiction. Even if written in jest, it would quickly overshadow their other accomplishment. For all we know, they could be a best selling author who doesn’t want to be known as the “My Immortal” author. If my speculation has any kernel of truth to it, then it makes sense as to why the real author will never come forward.
Some mysteries are best left unsolved. I’ve made peace with the fact that there likely will never be a definitive explanation as why this story was written. At the same time, it’s crazy to think that the real author is out there just living a normal life knowing that they wrote this infamous time capsule of a story.
Going back to claims of authorship, at this point I think that even if the original author were to come forward it would be near impossible for a few reasons. First of all, the original email was compromised a long time ago. It’s highly unlikely that the author has access to it. Then there’s the fact that, unless she has a hard drive containing the story in which the file was made prior to March 3rd of 2006, it would be hard to prove it is her. You can theoretically adjust the date and time an original file if you have the tech skills to do so.
All in all, I don’t blame her. With that all said, please don’t try to seek her out and respect her wishes to move on from this story. If she really wanted to come forward, she would’ve done so by now. If she wishes to come forward with irrefutable proof that it is her, then she will.
To Tara, if you are reading this: You are an icon, and I think it’s badass that you’ve created a distinctly millennial time capsule. It has everything we loved as 2000s teens, including musical tastes and fashion. You’ve managed to capture how people used to type in chat rooms before it went out of style. Your story has provided me with so many giggles during the hardest time periods of my own life, so I must thank you for that. I hope you know that you’ve developed something of a cult following over the years, because of how unapologetically you continued writing even when faced with backlash from readers.
Anyways, that is all for today. FANGZ 4 READIN U GUYZ
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